Asshole on a Segway

If there's anything worse than an asshole on a unicycle, it's an asshole on a Segway. Here's a picture, but the dorky nature of this device has to be seen to be believed. And there's finally a Segway rider in my tiny town, dorking his way up and down the street just like, sorry, an erection with wheels.

Applause from "self-balancing scooter" users:
* "It's pretty easy to drive around inside the office."
*"It can manuever through hallways and doors with ease and safety for the rider and those around him."
* I "ride a 1400 Suzuki.. this is barrels more fun and my Suzuki now just sits"

Uh huh. PLUS! It annoys (at least) everyone else on the sidewalk!
* "I almost got knocked down coming out of the dry cleaners on Fulton Street by some asshole on a Segway."

Nevertheless, don't assume the Segway is perfect! Users have some complaints too!
* "diabolical device of the demon of darkness" (Woops. This user was quoting a "Baltimore preacher in 1896 denouncing bicycles.")
* "It's fairly tiring to ride."
* "Standing still on a hard, bouncing platform makes my feet tired."
* "I can't quite drink a cup of coffee on it while moving at any speed"

Try a wheelchair!

FFS! These are not disabled people. Not yet, anyway. Just average American nerds who aspire to the lifestyle of the disabled.


UPDATE!
Now a Personal Zeppelin, that would be fun.