Monday, September 18, 2006

Air Force Parries Roswell Man's Claims

Gerald Lopez, 45, of Roswell, NM, claims that his face "mutated" after he witnessed a dazzling pink light over a local Air Force base. A spokesman for the Air Force expressed skepticism. "Our physicians have determined that Mr. Lopez's physiognomy lies within acceptable limits." He also raised the possibility that the "before" pictures may have been photoshopped. "Grzt zblrk ingxung Lopezzzz vooxi bibidigi," he added.


Blogger Desargues said...

I thought aliens mostly invade one's perineal cavities. That's what a lot of abductees say in their testimonies. But if he saw pink hovering above Roswell, it coulda been an alien gay pride parade -- surely something not seen ever before. Hence the bulging of the eyes. Puts some etymological meaning back into the phrase 'an exorbitant display'. Do you think he saw Roger from American Dad there?

2:09 PM  
Blogger Project WANNABE said...

I'm not sure. Maybe the pictures of other parts of his anatomy are classified, for reasons of national security.

2:56 PM  
Anonymous Waglund Humphreys said...

Base on my experience with UFO-related phenomena, I would suggest that what Mr. Lopez saw was probably a coherent "phosphene beam" of a type consistant with advance technology possibly either secret or extraterrestrial. These are real phenomena and very serious, see many accounts from reliable professionals observer (workers, personnel and retired people) who have seen these phenomena and reported remarkable consistent accounts!

7:01 PM  
Blogger HA HA HA said...

'consistent'. cnut. 'waglund' indeeeeed.

8:31 PM  

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